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March 92 - Office Memo

Office Memo

Bill Anderson

This is my second stab at writing this issue's MADA Office Memo. The first time around, I suddenly realized I was writing about changes in MADA and in object technology-which would have been the third column to deal with the subject. I think we'll just let the changes happen and quit exploring all the philosophical ramifications. (Hmmm... Did I just hear a collective sigh of relief?)

Instead, I'll introduce you to a covert group of engineers that collectively go by the name of "the very unofficial guys." For the second year running, this group has produced their own "very unofficial report" on the annual MADA conference, which they distribute the last day of the conference (and linked to MacApp3Tech$ this year). Though the group is shrouded in mystery, I can report that they are-in fact-members of the MacApp Team at Apple, and are rumored to be headed by the notorious Bernadette Jolicoeur, a.k.a. MacApp Quality Assurance Engineer. Excerpts from their tongue-in-cheek report follow:

The second annual very unofficial Orlando '92 MADA Conference Report

Top "Picks" for '92

Most Persistent ObjectRain
Most Improved PlayerThe Dessert
Best View EditorcePick
Best New Product NameNosePick, Jasik's view editor/disassembler
Worst Product NameSourceBug (still)
Best Status SymbolApple PowerBook
Worst Status SymbolApple Portable
Best New MethodologySolution Babe Modeling by Wayne Campbell
Best Audience Question"Why doesn't MacBrowse print?", Curt Faith
Best Speaker Resonse"It wasn't in the spec?", Bernadette Jolicoeur
Best AnalogyJames Plamondon "Calling OWL's exception handling a 'Safety Pool' is like calling a noose around your neck a 'Safety Rope.' If you fall, it will keep you from hitting the ground."

The unofficial top ten reasons to program for Windows

10.I want to beat Claris to the punch
9.Donald Trump is doing Windows programming tomake ends meet
8.I'll be more productive with Hungarian notation
7.C++ isn't enough of a challenge by itself
6.Bill Gates has far more money than John Sculley
5.We can finally feel superior to the competition
4.To remind us we actually like MPW
3.I secretly like MacApp 1.1 better
2.I've always wanted a square, white cursor
And the number one reason to program in Windows is...
1.My application doesn't need to scroll

As an added benefit, the "unofficial guys" included a Clip-N-Save Bonus in their report:

    The Unofficial View Edit Quick Reference Guide
    (Things we learned in the demos)

    "Don't hit the OK button in the preferences dialog-it will crash."

    "Don't run 3.0b2 under System 6-it doesn't like it."

    "You can see some screen anomolies, but that's okay."

    "Use 4-character view IDs, or else ViewEdit sticks in bogus characters."

    "You can have multiple docs open, but similar resource numbers

    will cause problems."

    "Dragging outlines don't agree with the actual size of the view."

    "ViewEdit won't stop you from adding multiple views with the same ID."

    "Option-UpArrow selects the next view above the selected view in hierarchy."

 

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